


All The Places That I've Been

by Tortellini



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Alternate Universe - World War I, Bitterness, Bittersweet, Bittersweet Ending, Character Study, Flashbacks, Gen, Sad, Sad Ending, Season/Series 02, War, Wordcount: 100-500, World War I
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-19 01:12:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11302671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tortellini/pseuds/Tortellini
Summary: Corporal Thomas Barrow reflects on the place he once called home while in a field hospital with a dying child--sorry, soldier.Oneshot/drabble





	All The Places That I've Been

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by ["Calls me home"](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/302283) by Shannon LaBrie. 



He remembers. He doesn't want to, believe me. But he does anyway. 

The boy in the hospital bed whimpers faintly, and Thomas Barrow pats his hand. He's feverish; even worse, the ugly gunshot wound in his leg is festering. He couldn't be any older than sixteen. Thomas doesn't want him to die alone. 

But at the same time... he's afraid he himself is losing it. Sometimes he'll just close his eyes, and... 

And he'll be home. Downton, he means, not anything else. He'll be standing downstairs in the kitchen, talking up Daisy and watching William get all flustered. Mrs. Patmore will screech some nonsense at poor Daisy, and she'll scurry off to get the pots. Then the cook will turn to Thomas and William, ordering them out with a swat of her dishcloth. Thomas will smirk. He'll obey too though, he's smart enough to know not to mess with her beyond a certain point--but he won't leave without sticking a finger in whatever's being made, just for a taste. 

The scene changes to the Servant's Hall. Sarah O'Brien will sit across from Thomas sewing, her brows creased. Anna and Bates will be deep in some sentimental conversation. Thomas might say something, and only O'Brien wouldn't reproach him for being "mean". He might feel bad. Then again, he might not. 

One last memory. He's in the dining hall, serving the family. He bends slightly to serve a dish to someone--Mister Crawley, the blonde bugger, or maybe Lady Sybil. She never seemed as high and mighty as her sisters. In doing so though, his eyes will flicker up to meet William across from him. William is made of soft cheeks, wide eyes, meek upturned eyebrows. He's not much, out here in the trenches, and they hardly ever cross paths. But in his thoughts like this...he's from home. 

Home. Mrs. Patmore screaming bloody hell at everyone early in the morning. Mr. Carson marking the wine ledger. O'Brien and her goddamn button box. William at the piano; Lady Sybil, patient and cheerful, helping Gwen. Tom Branson the chauffeur raging about something political. Everyone giving him weird looks about it. 

The smell of cigarette smoke. The gentle tinkling of Mrs. Hughes' keys. 

The low rumble of Carson's voice... the sound of the piano... dim candlelight from the bedrooms after the fires had gone out... 

* * *

 

The boy is dead in his cot in the morning. There's nothing Thomas Barrow can do but close his glassy eyes with his own hands... They shake. His old life is dead to him, just as this boy's is. The chances of him coming home at all are not good. 


End file.
